I came yesterday to silently recite the "El Moleh" and the Qaddish for Daniel during the gathering. I did not except the tusnami of emotions that swept over me, since I am hardly a stranger to these services. I am the single father of a youngish adult son who lives with me- like Daniel, with extraordinary gifts and not disimilar challanges. I am grateful that, try as I may, I could not enter into the depths of your pain yesterday, for to be able to do so would mean that I had gone mad. I will not allow myself to imagine it, although after yesterday my long-standing sense of dread for my son now has the face of a father and a mother. All I can do is become even more attentive and hold Noah even closer. That is your son's gift to mine. But I did quietly recide our traditional prayers, and joined aloud in the Qaddish. For the next month of Fridays I will include Daniel's name on our Qaddish list at my synagogue. Rabbi Bruce Diamond (bdiamond@fgcu.edu)